Saturday, 22 June 2019

99 Problems and a Capri Sun

Following on from my daughter's mishear of Jay-z's 99 Problems, here's 99 Problems and a Capri Sun. Best read in the rhythm of the original:

If you're having trouble with your pop and your fun.  I've got 99 problems and a Capri Sun.  Drinky. 

I got the Paw Patrol, after Paw Patrol

Foes that wanna tell me Season 6 is unknown.

Bad critics that say she's not in the know.

I've got Netflix, stupid. What type of facts are those?

I used to live on a street but now I live on a road.

My mummy's always saying, put away your clothes.

I love the colour orange cuz I'm the Amber Rose.

I only stuff the system when there's rules to oppose.

You can tell me that I'm crazy, you can tell me that I'm wrong.

My light's still burning brightly, I'm still singing my song.

I've got 99 problems and a Capri Sun. Drinky.

Got beef with the school, if my dojos don't glow?

Gonna cry big tears, when class pet don't show?

Look, I don't know what you take me as.

You can't get the intellect that this girl has.

In dresses or britches, snitches, I ain't dumb.

Yeah so pfft critics, you can alcazam, gone!

If you think I'm not stylish, I got my own fashion.

I got 99 problems and a Capri Sun. Drinky.

I got 99 problems and a Capri Sun.
If you're having trouble with your Pop and your fun. I got 99 problems and a Capri Sun.

From FS1 to now, and my record was clear.

But teacher's still thinking I've got cloth in my ears.

Now I'm not in it for rewards but reality's clear.

The original isn't fabbed,  the original is feared.

Yeah you can keep your sheep, I'm my own Bo Beep.

With me, even Jay-z starts to query his street.

Yeah, there was that time, I tidied in the library.

Ain't no crime people, though I ignored assembly.

Why did my teach make a whole big scene.

When I was just trying to keep the library books clean.

Top homework projects, still a no win cheer.

Anyone would think there was favourites up in here.

I forget your pets, I'm my own best one.

I got 99 problems and a Capri Sun.

If you're having trouble with your pop and your fun. I got 99 problems and a Capri Sun. Drinky. 

Big red combine harvesters, is what I sing in the school.

No one told me the timing was a part of the rule.

Yeah my voice is pretty loud, like the motorbike.

I don't raise my fists, cuz my words are my fight.

By just being me, I'ma get foiled again.

Systems with its rules, just snapping them.

Yeah I'm queen of my throne, I'm the chief captain.

Shout all you want, you won't twist my zen.

Yeah don't diss me, your whole life is a pun.

I got 99 problems and a Capri Sun.

If you're having trouble with your pop and your fun. I got 99 problems and a Capri Sun. Drinky.

If you're having trouble with your pop and your fun. I got 99 problems and a Capri Sun. Drinky.

If you're having trouble with your pop and your fun. I got 99 problems and a Capri Sun.

No comments:

Post a comment

Highlighted post

Feelings start

~Something visceral And beautifully wild Shimmering ripples Beginning inside Not just body Or even heart You sing the songs Th...

Popular content