Sunday, 8 May 2016

Pastalavista baby

I can't say pasta without adding pastalavista baby. It probably annoys others but how it amuses my daughter and I.(This is based on a quote from The Terminator film, and no, my four year old doesn't get the reference. It'll be many years before we watch it).

If I say ow because I've hurt myself, I generally follow it with 'Shamon mother fucker'. I trail off before the swearing in polite company. If I'm really enthusiastic, I also pretend to grab my crotch, Michael Jackson style.

If I could, I'd constantly wear PJ's. Only removing PJs for a shower or formal occasions. I would, of course, wear formal attire for formal occasions. Very important to remember that bit. Naked or PJs isn't good in posh restaurants or weddings.

I never, ever sleep naked. I really don't understand why anyone would do that.

I don't like to sleep in someone's arms. I like bed space. Although I seldom get bed space as my daughter believes me to be a cushion. Sometimes she sleeps all night in her own bed. These are good nights. These are rare nights.

I dislike the so called 'chase'. Do not chase me. I'll chase you. If you chase me, I'll run away, fast.

I don't understand why people still use text speak in messages.  Text speak is unnecessary and actually harder to write than full words.
When exercise video people say stuff like 'good job', I reply with 'thank you'. They can't see me. The video isn't real time interactive. Yet they offer helpful feedback. Thus I believe it's only polite to thank them, even though they are effectively not real.

I believe in fairies and angels.

I'm a witch. I don't wear a pointed hat.

I think I'm really funny. Sometimes I laugh at my own jokes for ages.  Years probably.

I do not tan. I worship the shade. The sun is beautiful when experienced under the protection of a densely leafed tree.

These are some facts about me that I felt like blogging. You might call them secrets. Former secrets.




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